People who grew up emotionally neglected tend to carry some false beliefs about emotions in relationships. (By Jonice Webb)

Here’s a good, but not exhaustive, sampling:

1. Sharing your feelings or troubles with others will make them feel burdened.

2. Sharing your feelings or troubles with others will chase them away.

3. If you let other people see how you feel, they will use it against you.

4. Sharing your feelings with others will make you look weak.

5. Letting others see your weaknesses puts you at a disadvantage.

6. It’s best not to fight if you want to have a good relationship.

7. Talking about a problem isn’t helpful. Only action solves a problem.

Fortunately, not one of these beliefs is true. In fact, they are each
and every one dead wrong. (The only exception is if you share your
feelings with another emotionally neglected person, who may not have any
idea how to respond). When you grow up receiving consistent direct or
indirect messages that you should keep your feelings to yourself, it is
natural to assume that those feelings are burdensome and undesirable to
others.

Female members of the IRA during The Troubles in
Belfast, Northern Ireland. The Troubles was a period of conflict in
Northern Ireland involving republican and loyalist paramilitaries, the
British security forces, and civil rights groups. Over 3,500 people were
killed between 1968 and 2001 – almost 2,000 of which were citizens.

Parasitic wasp larvae hatching from inside the living caterpillar host. The
female wasp will oviposit into the host’s body. The larvae will feed
inside the host until they are ready to pupate. Quite often the host is
dead by that point but if not, then the parasitoid will often eat its
way out of the host.