We think that the point is to pass the test or overcome the problem, but the truth is that things don’t really get solved. They come together and they fall apart. Then they come together again and fall apart again. It’s just like that. The healing comes from letting there be room for all of this to happen: room for grief, for relief, for misery, for joy.

Pema Chödrön, (b. 1936) American Buddhist, Nun and Teacher

Hypervigilance makes sense as a survival strategy. After our brain has perceived a life-endangering situation and gone into fight or flight, then some people’s brains will be on the alert for more situations that could also be threatening. If the type of trauma you experienced was abuse or assault, then you were hurt by a person or people. That’s obviously different than being bitten by a snake or in a car accident. And when we know our abuser, there is a breach of trust and emotional harm inherent in the assault.

So now when we find we’re getting close to someone, we start getting anxious. We look for signs we’re about to be betrayed or hurt. We get paranoid about someone’s tone or interval in responding to our texts. We’re anticipating the worst and unconsciously looking for signs that we’re right.

from How to Trust People Again

It’s hard to believe that human beings
can be classed as “feral”, but there have been a few isolated incidences
where this was indeed the case.

One of the most famous, is the story of Genie, known affectionately as “Wild Child”.
This beautiful young girl was rescued by the authorities when she was
13 years old and they were astonished to find that she acted like a wild
animal. Genie was timid, walked on four legs, and couldn’t speak any
English. She wasn’t raised by animals, as seen in other cases, but was
the victim of horrendous abuse that spanned over a decade. When she was
around one year old, her father decided to keep her socially and
physically isolated.

During this time, he kept her permanently strapped to a child’s toilet
or bound her in a crib with her arms and legs completely immobilized.
Nobody was allowed to interact with her and she had no stimulation of
any kind. She was also severely malnourished and had numerous vitamin
deficiencies.

Her cruel, abusive father promised her mother that if Genie survived
past the age of 12, he would allow her to call authorities to rescue the
child. Genie was rescued after a violent row broke out between her
parents, and her mother took her out of the house. (This was the first
time she had ever been outside). She was almost blinded by the sunlight,
and struggled to walk upright. Eventually, psychologists and language
experts began to look after Genie. As she was only fed baby food, she
had great difficulty chewing and swallowing and became distressed
whenever she saw food. Although she was very shy, Genie was highly
antisocial, and proved
extremely difficult for others to control. Regardless of where she was,
she constantly salivated, spat and growled at others. She had no sense
of personal property, frequently pointing to or taking something she
wanted from someone else. In addition, she did had no situational
awareness. Doctors wrote that she acted on impulse irrespective of the
setting, especially noting that she frequently engaged in open
masturbation and would sometimes attempt to involve older men.

After living in several foster homes and specialised hospitals, Genie
made some improvements. She had minimal manners and social etiquette.
She could speak a few words and showed a wide array of human emotions.
Her case is key in understanding human behaviour and holds a great deal
of scientific value. Today, Genie is in her late 50s and is still being
cared for by professionals and psychologists. She has improved a great
deal, but will always remain “feral” according to experts.