Tag: feelings

People who grew up emotionally neglected tend to carry some false beliefs about emotions in relationships. (By Jonice Webb)

Here’s a good, but not exhaustive, sampling:

1. Sharing your feelings or troubles with others will make them feel burdened.

2. Sharing your feelings or troubles with others will chase them away.

3. If you let other people see how you feel, they will use it against you.

4. Sharing your feelings with others will make you look weak.

5. Letting others see your weaknesses puts you at a disadvantage.

6. It’s best not to fight if you want to have a good relationship.

7. Talking about a problem isn’t helpful. Only action solves a problem.

Fortunately, not one of these beliefs is true. In fact, they are each
and every one dead wrong. (The only exception is if you share your
feelings with another emotionally neglected person, who may not have any
idea how to respond). When you grow up receiving consistent direct or
indirect messages that you should keep your feelings to yourself, it is
natural to assume that those feelings are burdensome and undesirable to
others.

Types of dissociation

1.
Amnesia – this is when you can’t remember incidents or experiences that
happened at a particular time, or when you can’t remember personal
information.

2. Depersonalisation – a feeling that your body is unreal, changing
or dissolving. It also involves out of body experiences, such as seeing
yourself as if watching a movie or floating above.

3. Derealisation – the world around you seems unreal. You may see
objects changing in shape, size or colour, or you may feel that other
people are robots or generally unreal.

4. Identity confusion – feeling uncertain about who you are. You may feel as if there is a struggle within to define yourself.

5. Identity alteration – this is when there is a shift in your role
or identity that changes your behaviour in ways that others would
notice.

When we stop taking responsibility for how we feel, we project how we feel onto others. One of the fundamental insights about emotional maturity is that we are responsible for our own emotional lives. No one makes us feel any particular way. If ten people are subjected to the same emotional environment, they will all feel different about what was said to them. What happens is mostly on automatic pilot because we are not conscious of it.

Adyashanti

are you an empath?

COMMON EMPATH SKILLS

  • You are unusually good at guessing how someone feels
  • You’re sensitive to other people’s moods
  • People find it easy to confide in you
  • You instinctively know what people want or need
  • You might feel someone’s emotions even if they’re not near you
  • You might feel other people’s physical sensations in your own body

COMMON EMPATH SIDE-EFFECTS

  • Feeling emotionally or physically overwhelmed in crowds
  • Feeling the weight of the world on your shoulders
  • Feeling emotionally drained when you have to touch a lot of people
  • Feeling like you need to help everyone by carrying their emotional pain
  • Random mood swings (angry, sad, scared, etc.) that have nothing to do with your life events
  • Hard time falling asleep or procrastinate going to bed